The guy isn’t here? Are you kidding?
Well, it was at least a little bit my fault – We traded emails yesterday and he proposed a 9AM, meeting and I accepted – but I never saw a confirmation email. I took it on faith that he would be there.
His admin sends him an email. 5 minutes pass. 10 minutes… She calls his cell – no answer. Meanwhile I had gotten up super early and fought traffic to make it all the way into the city for this meeting. To help him solve his problems.
No call? No show? Nothing?
That guy must be a real jerk. Does he have any idea how frustrating it is to show up and have him not be there?
A little while later he calls in. His admin says “He’s stuck in traffic and will be here in about 15 minutes. Can you talk to him on the phone and then hang around till he gets here?”
Wow. Uh. Ok. I guess.
Really inconsiderate. Who IS this guy?!?!?
All of a sudden, everything changes
He gets on the phone with me and says “Tom. I’m sorry – I’ve been out of the office since lunch yesterday. My son had an emergency yesterday and I’ve been up all night at the local hospital. There’s no cell service there and I’ve been completely out of the loop. I apologize for not being there to meet with you.”
WHOA. Talk about a “paradigm shift!”
Does this guy still seem like a rude, inconsiderate person?
I’m telling this story to say that sometimes people seem really upsetting – and some are. Other times they have so much going on in their lives that they don’t have space to be considerate.
At this point it looks like his son is going to be ok. We’re going to reschedule for sometime when my client has had less stress and some rest, and I’m going to continue to learn to be more compassionate. Does this sound like a good plan?
Who in your life needs a little more space to deal with their “stuff”? How can you help them?
Paradigm shift indeed. This is such a valuable lesson for all of us, Tom. We just never know what’s going on in the world of another.
In moments like those, we’re given the choice of either creating our own story and making that person the villain … or simply giving them the benefit of the doubt and/or exercising forgiveness.